things I have little patience for

I do not like:


doing dishes: I have done more than my fair

share...I know, doormat right?!




clean the house :my kids are old enough to do all the work. WHY should I subject myself to it?




Laundry- especially when I do not really have a laundry room and how to go down to the pit of hell/dungeon my husband calls a shop, which is as big as the upstairs of the house. It is unfinished and smells like...musty old dirt combined with more musty old dirt, and oil. Icky. Even the concrete floor is nasty. I used to mop in there once a year. My hoarder of a husband can not seem to fix, clean up, or throw anything out. I am not allowed to clean up down there heaven forbid I sort and place the wrong bolts together. They are bolts, for Pete's sakes.




My house needs so much work done, that I do not know how, what supplies, or be given the OK to work on.


I decided to paint my room from the awful color of pink to a gray shade. My husband said he would finish sanding down the areas that needed to be completed since 1995, yes I did say 13 years ago. I asked is he would do the edges. I have shaky hands. He said yes, and so I rolled the ceiling, and three walls. I am still waiting for him to finish what he said he would do. This was four years ago.


The hole in my kitchen floor in front of the stove, my husband kinda fixed temporarily, that is now back...for several months it been like that.




how cheap handles are on appliances. The door hand slowly came off my fridge. Everyone in the house has learned not to walk to closely or a sharp edge will scratch.






Lying-I absolutely hate, hate, hate.



I hate going for a spoon, to find none, or a fork. Really...? !Really...?! dishes are done, and clean and what I am looking for is not there ?



I hate waiting for something to come in the mail. It is like watching a pot boil. I hate that too.

Brain tumors

Mother in laws who think they have better insight to your marriage than you do when you have been married way longer than she was or in a relationship.

not having a car

not being able to drive it because gas is to expensive.

being depressed

getting on my pity pot

being lectured

cocaine and morphine

thieves

being vulnerable

being depended on for tiny small tasks or chores.

bees, and caterpillars I got bit and stung. I am allergic to them.

rude people

people who tolerate rude people. It just gives them the excuse to keep on being rude.

Ben-our evil genious

Six months ago we added a teacup Pom to the family. Primarily for my youngest because she had separation anxiety issues and had been sleeping with me for a while. She missed her father and would not leave my side. My husband was away at the time. I also, had my tubes tied years ago and now regret it. So with that in mind here is my jeez:

Love him or hate him
My oldest daughter broke her bed frame years ago and so the bed is on the floor. She likes to eat in her room. Last week, I made pork chops for dinner. She came out of her room and left her door open. Ben seeing this as an opportunity snuck in her room. He nabbed the pork chop, and got out before she returned. He hid with the pork chop, and enjoyed it.... She left the plate on the bed. Live and learn. A couple of nights later while making a sandwich she gave a couple of pieces of ham to Ben. Again, she went to her room, and left the plate on the bed. She returned to the kitchen where I was and was doing something when I noticed Ben watching her hoping for more ham. He realized that wasn't happening and trotted off down the hall seeing her door open. It took a second for me to realize what was happening. I ask if the sandwich was on the bed and told her Ben was going toward her room. Like a banshee she went down the hall full speed crying out BEEEENNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and stopped him just in time. A sheepish Ben came waltzing back out with a look on his face that said 'damn'. I know he will wait for the next time she leaves her door open.
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.

Geez

I don't know when it is I became a doormat. Everyone wants something of me. Drive my oldest to work, Mommy can I use your computer which means "what am I going to do now?" Its been a lifelong dream to sit with my kids while they are on the Internet. God, how tediously Boring with a capital B thank you. Whens dinner, what's to eat, Mom I need you. Where is all the glory, praise, and thanks. My son, asked me to go to the beach with him, Bored and without sisters to harass yesterday had to practically drag me away from my room to walk down to the beach on the boardwalk. Blah blah blah . I know that I am supposed to just suck it up and watch the late afternoon sun go down, smelling the honeysuckle, while the gulls and dirty damn ducks quack while they flyby. Actually once I was there I had a good time watching him dig holes and swim in the bay. Guess who was asked to drag the bogey board, and the dog on the leash home. He is a puppy and learning how to walk on a leash. God love him...the dog. He can not manage to stay on one side of me while I drag the board with the other hand.
I am stuck without a job, my oldest lands one. My youngest is lucky enough to go on a trip where she got to eat out three times that i know of, go to an amusement park, go to the beach and stay at a hotel ...the good life, I am stuck in my house without a working car, and no money, no cigarettes (shut up haters) with nothing fun to do . Not that I really want to do anything. It's nice to be asked, like my son. My husband who is notorious for "running an errand" "Be right back" is consitently back usually three hours later. Earlier tonight he came in just as dinner was going in the oven and I thought he said he was running to the hardware store before they close to get ...now correct me if I am wrong, does a car really have a need for a buttplug? 0_o Can you imagine the size of a car buttplug? Where does a car buttplug go anyway? The exhaust pipe? HMMM I'm not sure I really want to know the answer. Anyway back to my point. I said to him at 6:38 see you at 9pm. he muttered something naturally unkind and I said uhhuh, we'll see. Well....Its currently 940pm and no sign of him or my damn ciggerattes which he said he would bring me back a pack. I should know better by now. My directtv box burned up while he was gone and now I have nothing but this computer to kill time with. All this negativity is probably just my depression talking but then again. Maybe It will be justifiable homicide to. Nothing can be rationalized. Just remember my geez for the day. We moms are all just doormats plain and simple,

marriage

This is my first time blogging. I am starting this
to document our family craziness. We are into laughter. We are surrounded by sadness by many things. We are a strong group of individuals. I want to pass on my wisdom to the kids. I feel as though there is so much to say.
I have been married for 16 years. Together for 20. We met in high school. I have always said that even if you do not have anything left to hang on to in the marriage there is always love. Love does not always mean forgiveness, it means that you can forget, and get past the hurt. We took vows for richer, for poorer, in sickness, and health, till death parts us. These are words of promise. They are taken seriously. Granted they are just words, but put together the words are very powerful. I know most marriage vows are universal in content. Spoken so many times people recite them all the time. It seems to me that people in general take the vows for granted. What do you have if you do not have your word. Your word is your honor. Honor is not given the status it deserves anymore. You do not break promises. Do what you say your going to do. Not just in marriage, but in life.
The current culture on marriage is that it is alright to diorce if things just get hard. To me that is hogwash. I believe that things will always work themselves out given time. Fighting is a working form of communication. If you can get past the tone and insults and listen, not hear (they are two very different words) to the message, and try to respond with understanding what they want, and compromise ( I know that this does not always happen). It may take time, and several fights to have both see the light. Believe me I forget all the time!
I know there are many reasons couples divorce. I am not saying that it is wrong for another individual to divorce. This is my thoughts of the topic. What is right for one does not mean it is right for another.
Three children, a 15 year old girl, 11 year old boy, and a 9 year old girl. I will be writing about a number of topics that will come up as I go, or whatever strikes me. Writing is a form of peace for me.